Over time, it became clear that the principles formulated by Hellinger apply not only to families, but also to other vital groups, organizations, and systems. In these systems, the method can be used in the same way, or in a similar manner. Work carried out in workplaces and other organizations and systems came to be called organizational constellation. The term “systems constellation” refers to exploring the systems that matter in a person’s life—such as the family, where one receives life; the workplace, where one earns what is needed to sustain life; or groups and situations where one is confronted with questions of life and death—using family constellation or modified variants of the method. Such a group can include, for example, the participants of an accident: some survive, some are left disabled, and some die. According to the observations of Hellinger and his colleagues, in every case a hidden network of connection is formed—sometimes, for lack of a better term, called a shared soul.

Hellinger-style family constellation is a way of “asking” this field. According to both international and Hungarian experience, family constellation is extremely powerful, precise, and effective. On the one hand, it sheds new light on the difficulties, illnesses, and failures that weigh on our lives; on the other, it can make it possible—often through an emotional experience that may deepen into catharsis—to lay these burdens down. All of this can take place in both group and individual sessions.
Family constellation is based on Hellinger’s observations and those of his colleagues—mainly psychotherapists—who took an active part in developing the method. Around the same time, the English biologist and philosopher Rupert Sheldrake began exploring the invisible connections that exist among related beings: members of animal groups, an animal and its owner, and people who belong together and live in close bonds with each other. According to his theory, this is an energy field through which individuals can “know” about one another even at a distance. Many of us have personal experience that such knowing exists. Sheldrake supported this through numerous experiments that also meet the criteria of Western science (he calls the invisible network between related living beings “morphogenetic fields”). In 2003, at the First International Conference on Family and Systems Constellations held in Wiesloch, Hellinger and Sheldrake agreed that they were working with the same phenomenon.

According to Hellinger’s observations, strict laws prevail in the family soul or field; when these laws are violated, they have a negative effect on family members across generations. Hellinger called them the “orders of love”; in Hungarian we found the word “laws” to be the most fitting expression.

• The right to belong: According to the first law of Hellinger-style family constellation, every member of the extended family (the clan) has an equal right to be acknowledged by the others as belonging to the family. This right is often violated: sometimes someone is literally cast out because, for example, they have done something that does not fit the family’s moral values. Sometimes someone is pushed into oblivion because remembering them is too painful. In this way, the family may try to exclude the memory of a young child who died early—acting as if the child had never existed. The child’s energetic imprint remains in the field; only on the level of behaviour is there a void where they should be.
A special phenomenon is the case of a “lost twin.” According to more recent investigations, on average every 8th–10th pregnancy begins as a twin pregnancy, but at some point one twin stops developing. It disappears without a trace, or a lump remains in the placenta. It can also happen that a cyst in the surviving child contains embryonic tissues of the lost twin. Even if the surviving child does not know about the lost twin, the imprint remains in their soul and cells, and they may unconsciously search for them throughout their life.
We also deny the right to belong when we say someone died of a heart attack when, in fact, they died by suicide. In doing so we cast out that person’s fate—and in the family constellation system, a person and their fate are inseparable.

• The law of place: According to the principles of Hellinger-style family constellation, every family member has their own place in the system (compare it to a puzzle: the picture is only complete if every piece is present and each is in its proper place), and one can live well only in one’s own place. A person receives life from their parents; therefore, for the child the parent is always the “Big” one, and the child is the “Small” one. If a child experiences themselves on the same level as the parent (for example, actively intervening in the parents’ relationship, taking sides and giving advice), or experiences themselves as even “bigger” than the parent (for example: “I’ll give you, Father, what you didn’t receive from my grandparents”), then on an experiential level they jump one or two generational rungs above their own place. In this way they cannot live their own life, become rootless and stressed. The experience of being a child is missing, which they will most likely try to compensate for later in their intimate relationships.
There is order horizontally as well: among those on the same generational rung, there is a first, second, third, and so on, depending on who entered the family system in what order. There is a first, second, and later child—and there is also a first, second, and later important relationship in adult life. If someone is deprived of the place that is rightfully theirs, the system will, in a sense, “make it right.”

• The law of balancing: In Hellinger’s brilliant insight, a completely unfair and unconscious group conscience operates in the family or system soul: if something vitally bad happens to one member, someone else—typically someone born later—begins to live, feel, and behave as if that bad thing had happened to them. In that person, feelings and emotions arise as if they had been cast out, as if they had lost their parents, their love, their child early, as if the same blow of fate had struck them. They live as if they had said in their soul:
“Dear parent, grandparent, relative, I would rather carry this hard fate for you than you.”
“If you had to go, I will follow you—into illness, misfortune, death.”
“I will live through your hard emotions for you.”
“If you could not be happy, then neither will I.”
“If you were cast out, I will represent you.”
“I will atone for you.”
If, with knowledge of Hellinger’s laws, we examine why we cannot live the way we would like, it very often turns out that order was violated in our family—one of the three laws of family constellation—and balancing (restorative) actions and modes of operation are activated in the system, that is, in the family soul. In other words, the Hellinger-style system conscience comes into play, and as one of its manifestations, for example, a child begins to live poorly without any understandable reason, or shows some physical or psychological symptom. Because in such cases the causes are not in the person’s own life story, physical and psychological treatments may remain ineffective until the hidden, unconscious vow described above comes to light and dissolves. This method, which may still feel novel today, has brought rapid and striking improvement in many therapy-resistant cases. Depressions that were inexplicable based on one’s own life story, repeated performance and relationship failures, suicidal tendencies, and—if irreversible changes have not yet developed—physical illnesses have often improved as well.

Let us look at a few examples of cases in which it is likely that the system conscience is activated, and someone born later tries to “make up for” the bad thing that happened to an ancestor. In other words, what counts as a vitally hard fate in the Hellinger-style family constellation system: when someone could not be born, or was born but died relatively early, before the prime of life; when someone suffered great, life-altering blows of fate and losses; when someone committed a serious wrongdoing and had to, or should, atone; when someone was truly cast out or, in a sense, erased from the family’s collective awareness.

Our siblings—meaning all of them, every single one with whom we share at least one parent. Parents and their siblings; grandparents and their siblings; in some cases great-grandparents as well; and also the important relationships of parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents before their marriages. This is the group of people—of souls—whose fate seems to be bound together, whether the members know about one another or not.
A relatively new and surprising experience is how strong an unconscious bond can be created by being born “at someone else’s expense.” Here we need a brief detour: In any intimate relationship where the question arises that the two people might pass life on together, a psychological bond forms—often with little to do with love or being in love, existing independently of them. If such a bond ends for any reason and in any circumstances, it hurts the soul—we know the deep pain that can be experienced at divorce, instead of the expected relief at the end of a bad marriage. If my parent’s or grandparent’s previous relationship, for some reason, gives way to the person from whom I received my life—for example, the former partner dies and thus frees the place, or for some reason they cannot stay together—then that person truly contributed to my coming into existence. Since breaking out of a bond hurts, they paid a price for my life through that pain. Through this pain, they gain their place in our extended family—in other words, as Hellinger calls it, in our clan. They also “belong to us,” and it is due to them that we acknowledge their sacrifice and accept it with respect.

For every person, their parents and family represent the most important bond in their life. Yet for many, the words “my family” also carry pain, anger, and a sense of lack. Sometimes a taking-on of fate stands in the way of a child feeling that they belong to the family. Sometimes the parents’ fate-taking and their story prevent them from providing an ideal environment for their child, who then can grow up only at the cost of much lack and pain. And if a person cannot feel, emotionally as well, that they received life—and received it in the way it could be given—then they become rootless and unhappy. Something will always be missing—something big and essential.
But if one sees how the great power called Fate shapes everyone’s life—one’s own just as much as one’s parents’—and how the laws of life, love, and order operate in all of our lives, then perhaps one understands that they received from their parents everything they were able to give. And what they could not give—what hurt, what was missing—that is the price of their life. Perhaps they can understand with their heart as well that they receive from their roots everything needed for life: the substance of the body and the energies of the soul came to them through their parents, grandparents, great-grandparents, and those who came before them. And if, out of unconscious childlike love, they do not believe they must carry someone else’s fate and emotions, then they can lay down the taken-on fate, take their own life into their hands, and make something very good of it—so that their family members can see it was worth passing it on to them: the greatest gift one human being can give another.

The effectiveness of Hellinger-style family constellation is supported by the positive changes that have begun in the lives of participants in past sessions—either immediately or after a few months. According to the results of one of the first studies, in the lives of participants, marked positive changes occurred in an average of 78% of cases, 14% experienced improvement, and in 8% of cases family constellation had no effect. The effectiveness of Hellinger-style family constellation—developed by the mid-1980s and continuously evolving ever since—began to be studied from the late 1990s onward. International results can be read on the website of the German Association of Systems Constellators. In 2008, the International Systemic Constellation Association (ISCA) was founded; I currently chair its Research Committee. At present, we are working on compiling the results of research conducted worldwide so far, and on carrying out a major international impact study.

As throughout the world, family constellation is spreading here as well. It has become a “fashion item,” and as is usual with fashion items: there is an original and there is a cheaper copy. Often it is a matter of luck what someone comes across; however, in this case it is worth choosing at least as carefully as we would when buying car tyres, shoes, or any other product or service. Hellinger-style family constellation is a powerful method. It can do great good—and it can also do great harm. It is worth turning to a professional facilitator who has completed several years of thorough training that meets international norms, has passed examinations, and holds a diploma. It is also good if they know, in line with their qualifications, what types of problems they can undertake to address, understand the limits of their competence, and have a suitable network of psychotherapist and physician colleagues to whom they can refer a client when necessary.
Among those trained by the Rendszerakadémia (Systems Academy), those who are independently licensed to provide healing activity receive the qualification “family constellation therapist.” Those who do not have such a qualification, but hold a different university or college degree and have completed the Rendszerakadémia’s 3×25-day training, receive the qualification “family constellation counsellor” (see: http://www.rendszerakademia.hu). If the problem the client presents requires a healing activity, they refer the client to colleagues who, by virtue of their basic qualifications, are entitled to provide care with Hellinger-style family constellation and/or other therapeutic methods. More and more physicians and psychotherapists refer their clients to family constellation. In such cases, I respectfully invite the treating professional of the person referred to me to attend the group work as a guest—being present at their client’s constellation—so that the results can be used in further psychotherapy.

From experience and feedback, we can infer in what kinds of cases it is generally worth coming to a family constellation.
Here we note that although impact studies suggest that family constellation generally brings positive changes, it is not realistic to think that the method provides a complete solution for every client and every problem. Therefore, if a facilitator promises too much and guarantees certain success, it is better to look for someone who knows the limits of both the method and their own competence. Behind physical and psychological difficulties there may be causes rooted in one’s own life story, just as there may be the mostly unconscious fate-taking described above. It also often happens that, as a result of fate-taking, a client develops attitudes, ways of relating, and relational patterns from childhood onward that make them more vulnerable psychologically. In such cases, the cause that triggers the current state, symptom, or blockage can be sought both in the functioning of the family soul and in the person’s own life story—so intervention is needed on both levels. In such situations, we recommend combining family constellation with psychotherapy.
Based on my own more than ten years of experience facilitating family constellations and on international literature, family constellation tends to bring positive changes in the following cases:
• long-term disturbances in the parent–child relationship, even in adulthood
• childhood lacks and wounds that remain painful in adulthood
• relationship problems and repeated failures
childlessness; fear of having children
difficulties in managing one’s way of life
• performance below one’s abilities; inhibited seeming progress and success
recurrent, prolonged and/or severe physical illnesses
• inexplicable low mood, depression, anger, rage and other difficult emotions
• alcohol problems and other addictions
• psychological problems persisting despite psychotherapeutic treatment: mood disorders, suicidal urges, anxiety, panic, eating disorders, sleep disorders, childhood behavioural disorders, performance difficulties (preferably we work in the presence of the treating professional)
• recurring workplace problems that resist attempts at resolution
• difficult life situations and decisions
According to experience, Hellinger-style family constellation has brought positive change for those who present with these and similar problems. If someone needs additional psychological support to process the topic, we recommend psychotherapists with whom we have worked for a long time and whom we know also use the results of family constellation in their psychotherapeutic work.